Sophia White
Stories
6
Chapters
1,465
Words
493.5 K
Comments
0
Reading
1 d, 17 h
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“Did you hear something?” Beatbox frowned slightly as he looked towards the brewery. Rumbob tipped his head and strained his ears. “That high pitched screamin’ sound?” “Yes. It sounds like my daughter when she sees a particularly good deal on wrenches.” “Sounds more like Erd’s most excited kettle to me.” “I think it’s coming from inside the Thirsty Goat. Should we go check it out? Or vacate? They did have something explode here last year.” “Nah, I’m sure it’s fine.”…-
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Four competitors, four mugs of ale. Chuck grabbed my foot and Rumbob thumped him in the nose. Tania tried to clinch Rumbob's neck, but his girth prevented it. I used with my fist on Chuck's fingers and broke his grip. Finally we were all forced to disengage as we reached out and desperately grabbed at various handles. “!” Tania’s gauntlet pounded into my wrist, and my fingers shook. kept me from dropping the mug, but it was enough to cost me a single desperate second as I regained my grip. I…
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Okay Pete, you’ve got this. It's just a small curve ball! Let’s run down what I’ve got. was essentially a second life. could give me the correct course of action in a pinch. would come in handy if I… thought of a mug as a pick? Doubtful, but worth a try. wouldn’t be much help. I’m still dying to go to the market and test it, which should be possible later this week. should help with holding onto my tankard. The ever awesome would ensure I couldn't get taken out in one hit.…
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Welcome to the WWB! The World's Worst Beer! Ten people enter. One winner leaves. A match for the ages. The ‘Goliath’, The ‘Heartbreaker’, The gnomish ‘Demon of Artifice’, The ‘Basic Bitch Warrior’, The ‘Pink Panic’, The ‘Tiny Tank’, The ‘Aptly Named’ The ‘Great White’ Finally the ‘Cicerone’, YEAAAHHHHH!!!! The crowd goes wild! Peter! Peter! Pete! Pete! “Pete?” Pete! Pete! Pete! “Pete!” “Huh, wuzzat?” I turned away from the massive…
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I said my goodbyes to Thatch, who merrily went up into the stands to sit with his wife and son. He didn’t care in the slightest that he’d been the last to finish at our table. “Guid lachk thar Pete.” “Thanks Thatch, hope you enjoy the rest of the show.” “Dontcha warry, ay will.” And so the top one-hundred drinkers in Minnova went on to the next round. The staff came out and moved tables around as a grumble of dwarves moseyed around the Lord. All the royals, schmoozing up there while us…
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The competition banner was over an enormous spiral staircase that led deep underground. Balin and I followed the throng down into the deep as we circled the granite stairs. We were all following several arrows that read ‘Colosseum This Way’. “Balin, is there really an “Aye, a big one. People bet on fights there.” He answered. “They use it fer other events too, like tha beer competition.” “Fights like dwarf versus dwarf, or monster killing?” “Both. There’s magic on it ta keep…
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“You see Balin, the main ways to earn money quickly are stealing, winning the lottery, or gamblin’. We already won the lottery with gunpowder, but all the advance went to our indenture, so we’re left with stealing and gamblin’.” “I think yer gamblin’ here Pete.” “Naww, I disagree. I have a monstrously high vitality, and dwarven ale doesn’t affect me much. I’m nearly guaranteed to win this competition, which makes it practically stealing.” I grinned at Balin, who simply shook his…
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It was a beautiful day. The birds were singing. There are no birds here. The sky was blue. There is no sky. The grass was green. The groundcover is mostly brown scrub. I had a beautiful woman by my side. “Aaron’s Arse! Penelope stop trying to eat my pants!” Shoveling goat shit. I hummed a little “Highway to Hell” as I dodged a headbutt to my crotch, I was getting good at that, and started up the hose. Penelope made a graceful pirouette over the water as I aimed at…
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“Is this it?” “I think it is, Pete.” “There could be multiple places in Minnova called ‘Thirsty Goat Brewing” “I think that’s unlikely.” “Minnova’s a big place.” “Not that big.” “But it “Aye, but this is probably it.” “I could go in incognito and scope it out, make sure it’s the right place.” “I could wear a disguise?” “You got anythin’ to use fer one?” “I could go buy one, we still have…. over a hundred silver.” “Seems a waste of…
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I sipped on my coffee and sighed. Then I took a deep sniff of the roasted scent of beans and cream and sighed again. The rich aroma reminded me of a dark roast, while the thick texture and flavour was closer to a cappuccino. I swished the dark liquid around in my mouth and savoured the mouthfeel of the tannins. It burned slightly going down the back of my throat, but it was a good burn. A good cup of coffee can ignite the tastebuds and invigorate the mind, and this was a damn good cup of coffee. I'd asked…
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